(Untitled)

I have a picture of you
Yet the image is blurry
Is it you that is blurry
Or is it the mental denotation
Of that day, those days
That is blurry?
Sitting and wondering
How much I loved you
Or better yet, how much I loved
Your ways, your charismatic ways
Your swagger was immense
Your eyes captivated every word,
Thought, and expression I ever expressed
Your graciously came into my life
Yet as graciously as you came in, you left
You left with questions floating abroad
Why's, and How's, and Who's
And tons of What If's
Wondering if myself was not good enough
Instant replays running through my head
Of what I could, would have, should have
But didn't change
I never did have the courage
To admit to myself, it was all you
And then I realize I became like most
Putting myself down, and putting you up
On some golden pedestal
Like you ever earned or redeemed that position
So now your gone, and I wonder why you ever came
Life's a struggle
and I struggled with you
Now I'm done, and your gone